at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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