i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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