we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
