I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
