no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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