I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Randomize
