I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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