Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Randomize
