But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
