If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
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