She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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