we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
