So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
