How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
