I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
