And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
