I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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