It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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