And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
this boner is exhausting
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
