Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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