so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
