if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Randomize
