I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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