Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize