so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
