I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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