Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Just cropdusted the office
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
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