i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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