scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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