the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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