youre lurking in front of me
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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