what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
