Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize
