it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
