nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
