my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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