don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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