He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
