no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
