i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
