ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
My cat gives me a boner
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
