No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
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