omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
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