Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
