Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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