bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Randomize
