he puts the penis in happiness.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
