is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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