that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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