I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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